The Weak In Rock

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)
An unstable pharmacist humiliates you over your hemorrhoid medication.
Angelina Jolie comes on to you at a holiday party, but your cavalier
remark about the pigs-in-a-blanket sends her off in a huff. Your blues
tune about eating Raisin Bran becomes a major hit for an indie polka
band. Taking a class in medieval tampon storage pays big dividends in
future endeavors.

Makes about as much sense as most “real” horoscopes.

Hat’s off to 23/6 for the chuckle.

The Onion nails it again with a farewell article from George W. Bush.

This was my favorite bit:

“Everywhere I look brings back memories. The Blue Room is
where Laura and I put up our first White House Christmas tree. Down
the hall, in the East Room, is where I concocted my favorite signing
statement to circumvent the anti-torture guidelines of the Detainee
Treatment Act of 2005, and=97ooh!=97right across the way is where Cheney
and I decided to use the death of 3,000 Americans on 9/11 and the
nation’s subsequent fear of another attack as an excuse to carry out
our long-standing plan to invade Iraq. I should really get a picture
before I leave.”

Like I said, I’d be laughing more if it weren’t completely true.

My friends and I have been ripping on Plaxico Burress for a few days
over his “accident”, or as one blog put it his Plaxident - the
definition of which is doing something incredibly stupid that costs
you $35 million.

Anyway, this
clip from the Daily Show has Jon Stewart just utterly destroying
the guy, plus adding a pretty funny original segment of his own. Now
I just want to know where I can pick up a copy of Plaxico’s song.
It’s pretty darned catchy.