Pseudo food…

Shocking News: All Froot Loop Colors Are Really The Same Flavor – Consumerist.

It’s funny. I’ve had a discussion about this very topic with my daughter, who insists that Froot Loops’ different colors represent different flavors. They don’t. And when you think about it, why would they? The color, especially when it discolors the milk, and the sugariness of the little oat wheels is the draw for kids. If the orange tasted like, well oranges, then there’d be a whole demographic of children who wouldn’t like Froot Loops if they didn’t like oranges.

This is also one of the ways you know that Froot Loops, or Fruity Pebbles or Trix are not food, but rather food-like substances. In nature when two pieces of actual food are radically different colors from one another they taste radically different from one another. That pigmentation is developed by the same genes in the plant that create flavor and texture. That Froot Loops taste exactly the same whether they are blue or red is a, well, red flag, that this is not food. Nature doesn’t make food that way. Only people do stupid shit like that.

Similarly, nature doesn’t make foods that won’t spoil, because spoilage and decomposition is a product of digestion by bacteria, which is, by the way, how our bodies digest the food we eat – bacteria that live in our gut break the food down into the bits we need. So, if you eat something manufactured in a plant that was designed to keep for months on a store shelf it’s not entirely reasonable for you to expect your gut bacteria to be able to break it down properly… if at all.

Short version –

Different colors but tastes all the same = not food.

Won’t rot = not food.

Night all.

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