Van Halen and the Presidency…

I’ve written a couple of times about how I’m supporting John Kerry not because I think he’s some sort of progressive savior for American government, but because Dubya is a radical and Kerry will, sort of push the reset button on American politics and at least get us back to where we were in 2000. Today I got an email from Eddie Spaghetti of the Supersuckers where he sums it up simply enough for rock and roll fans to understand…

“To my republican friends (and I hope you are still my friends if you’ve made it this far into my email) I have this rock-n-roll analogy for you:

“Let’s say that the Republican Party is Van Halen and (for the sake of argument we will time travel quite a bit) Abraham Lincoln is the David Lee Roth of Republicans. An ass kicking, slave freeing, minimize-the-government-in-our-lives bad ass. The glory years. Then let’s say that Sammy Hagar is the Ronald Regan character, he totally lost the die-hard but for some reason Van Halen had never been more popular. Hit after hit. The Van Halen machine makes more money than anyone thought possible! Next, sadly, it’s time to enter that guy from Extreme, Gary Cherone. Here is our G.W. Bush. Even the most dyed-in-the-wool Van Halen fans have to admit, this was one bad idea, it didn’t work and, thankfully we only had to put up with one record from this version of the Republican Par…, uh, I mean… Van Halen. Gary made Van Halen so bad that Sammy Hagar returning actually seems to be a GOOD idea!

“So there you go, even Republicans have to admit that G.W. has totally “Gary Cheroned” this Presidency, don’t you think? I thought this would help clear things up for you. Now get out there and buy one of those “Republicans For Kerry” stickers and help us make this change. Sure Kerry’s no Diamond Dave either, but who is anymore? It’s not like Van Halen’s gonna ask ME to sing for ’em…”

And Eddie closes with some simple and good advice – vote. No excuses folks. Get out and poke that touch-screen next Tuesday.

Comments are closed.